Dinobots: The Age of Idiocy
by TheCharredDragon
Summary: When Rocky the Velociraptor pulls a prank on Snarl the Spinosaur and Grimlock the T. rex, the two end up fighting, Paulie gets caught in the crossfire and what happens? Two words: total idiocy. (A Transformers 4 One-Shot)


It was a pleasant afternoon in Azral, a sanctuary for the prehistoric Autobot group called the Dinobots, where many of the plants and so on were around since the dinosaurs. Why was it created? Well, hence the name, the Dinobots were Transformers that transform into dinosaurs, and because most of the members are ridiculously large, they can cause utter chaos in an urban or suburban area. So, the government decided to construct an area where the Dinobots can smash freely, and, for the sake of civilians' safety, the construction was kept top-secret.

But right now, Azral isn't a paradise to the Dinobots…

"If you didn't fall on me, we wouldn't be suspended!" Snarl, a blue and black striped Spinosaur, yelled.

"Me fall? You trip me!" Grimlock the T. rex leader bellowed.

"Ugh…" Paulie, a purple draconic pteranodon muttered.

The two, Snarl and Grimlock, have been arguing since around sometime before noon. They were arguing about what happened in the most recent mission the Dinobots participated. What happened was that while they were sneaking up (which was near impossible for their sizes) on some Decepticons until Grimlock fell on Snarl and gave away the Autobots' position, letting the Decepticons get away. And so, because of Snarl and Grimlock arguing on who's fault was it, the Dinobots got temporarily suspended and are forced to stay in Azral. This is why they're arguing.

"Ugh…They've been at it for _hours_… Can't they take a break?" Paulie complained as she cleaned her razor sharp wings.

"You know they go big egos Paulie. So what do you expect them to do? Drink tea and talk civilized?" Rocky the brown velociraptor joked as he watched his two friends fight.

Paulie chuckled at Rocky's joke, but still sighed anyway. "No, but still… No one can argue that long without stop, can they?"

"Hey, we've seen _peace talks_ last longer than that and they were certainly less peaceful than these two." The raptor pointed out.

"I'm just saying I want them to stop." Paulie retorted, but all Rocky did was shrug.

Transformers have very long lifespans than can last for hundreds of millennia. So, the grudges and fights can last equally or longer than that. But she still had a point. What's done is done. There's nothing you can do about it.

"What?! Take that back!" Snarl demanded, snapping Paulie and Rocky out of their thoughts.

Grimlock scoffed. "Me no give back, Skinny Fin."

"All right, THAT'S IT!" Snarl then whipped his against Grimlock's face.

"Why you!" Grimlock shot a stream of fire from his mouth and right at Snarls face.

Snarl turns, making his get burned from the flames. Snarl growled lowly. The two were about charge head-to-head until Paulie intervened by standing in the way.

"Woah, woah, woah, guys! Calm down! There's no need to escalate this!" Paulie stated, flapping her wings in frustration.

The two grumbled as their eyes boring at the others, before parting in opposite ways. Snarl to his riverside habitat and Grimlock to his savannah-forest mix one. Paulie kept on eye on both of them in case they attack out of nowhere. But they disappear out of her sight without so much as a complaint. Paulie gave a sigh before flying to the nearest tall rock and perched on it. When she was comfortable, she let off a yawn and decided to take a nap, having not much to do.

But unlike the others, Rocky wasn't put down or the like, no. In fact, he was mentally laughing his head off. Why? Because he was the one who made Grimlock fall on Snarl, by Slug's suggestion. Slug was a triceratops and Rocky felt like he wanted to do a prank, although why he didn't know why, and he got a tip from Slug. That, as you can see, is working as great as a bomb destroying an important bridge. And now, Rocky is going to continue his spree of glee, starting with Snarl…

* * *

Snarl couldn't believe it. Grimlock, his leader, is accusing him of blowing the mission? He just couldn't believe it. He didn't make Grimlock fall, he was sure of it. Grimlock just tripped on his tail and fell on him, that's all. But Grimlock is accusing him of tripping him on purpose? Snarl let off a frustrated roar. He just didn't get it. He couldn't understand. But boy, he's going to get it for what he said. But, although he could speak fluently, he couldn't come up with an ingenious way to get back at him without him knowing he did it. He wasn't an expert prankster after all.

"Hey Snarl, you okay?"

Snarl looked below him and saw the smallest member of the team staring at him with concern.

"Of course I'm not okay. That Hammerhead just accused me of tripping him and called me 'Skinny Fin'!" Snarl knows it's not much, but what Grimlock said hurt his Spark.

"Hey, I'm just bein' polite." Rocky retorted.

Snarl sighed. "Sorry buddy but I really wanna get back back at him for that."

"Need help with that?" Rocky asked with a slight smile.

Snarl blinks, surprised that Rocky wants to help, but he makes a toothy smirk. Now he has a way to get back at Grimlock. "Sure. So what's the plan?"

"All right, here's what you'll do…"

* * *

Grimlock was angry. More than that, he was really angry. Sure, he doesn't like to be quiet and all but he wouldn't blow a mission. And Snarl blaming him? He gets angry at even the thought. He was sure Snarl's tail wasn't in the way but he still fell anyway and blew the mission. He let a roar of anger before slugging his tail on a nearby rock and expected it to smash into pieces. But instead, his tail ricocheted and the sudden force made him scream as he flew.

He crashed into another rock before skidding to a stop (on his side). Groggily, he stood up with the help of his tail. He shook his head to get rid of the dizziness before he looked at the rock in confusion.

"What? Rock not hard to smash, why this hard?" He though aloud.

He moves closer to the rock until he's face-to-face to it. He narrowed his eyes and then he reared his head before trying to break the stone, but the same thing happened again, except not so strong. He shook his head, trying to ease the dizziness since his arms are too small to rub it. He started to stare at it. He could hear it taunting, "Oh, you can't crush me. You're weak!" And he wasn't going to let that slide. So, he started to bash it in many ways.

He slashed it, he banged it, he stomped it, he pushed it, he bit it, he fired his fire breath at it, he tackled it and he jumped on it. But none of it worked. And now, Grimlock is going to pull the last resort, you could say. He backed away from the little devil and after a considerable distance, he charged at the invincible mineral with his maw wide open. He got closer and closer and closer and closer and closer until he clamped on the rock with all his might. But just like before, he was pushed twice as far as he attacked.

He crashed on his back and skidded to a stop. He groaned and then with the help of momentum, he got up and sat down. He then starred at the rock with disdain. He couldn't understand it.

"Why rock not break?"

He continued to stare at it in despair, very close to tearing up, or, at least the Transformers version of it. But he was snapped out of it when he heard something. Something that sounded muffled. So he looked to his right and he found out the source of the sound. Off fading in the distance was Snarl, laughing out loud. Grimlock got mad and started to growl upon realizing what was going on.

He had been pranked.

He gave an enraged roar, stood up, and looked back at the stone. Upon closer inspection, there was a portable magnet shield—a type of force field that uses magnetism—behind the rock. His oil stated to boil and his gears started to grind each other at their rapid speed.

"HE DEAD!"

He roared again and then he started to throw a tantrum. After nearly destroying his habitat (again), he stopped and now was sitting down, thinking.

"Somethin' wrong Grimlock?"

He knew that voice. He looked down and there he saw the fastest of his team, Rocky, looking at him curiously.

"Snarl trick me! Now mad! Me want to trick him, but can't think."

"So, do you want me to help?" Rocky asks with a toothy grin.

Grimlock thinks on this, before he answers, "What me do?"

And Rocky's grin became a smirk.

* * *

_Oh Cybertron, that was priceless!_ Snarl thought with glee as he walked to his habitat. _And that look on his face? Hilarious!_

As you can tell, Snarl's extremely happy that Rocky's plan worked. And now he was going to bask in his triumph by snacking on his favorite food: fish, sawfish to be precise. Yes, he might be a robot, but that doesn't mean he can't get hungry. After all, he's a Spinosaur.

After catching a several sawfish, he starts to eat. But as he ate, he was cautious. More than one time, he heard rustling and he suspected it to be Grimlock. Although he's not sure how Grimlock found out (if he found out) the ruse, considering that his process module is slow even for a Dinobot, he still thought it was him since no Decepticon knew of Azral.

He heard another rustle and this time, it was louder. He then crept to where he last heard the sound. Another shake, he started to lower himself as much as possible. The rushing of the bushes starts to be consecutive. Then it starts to be even louder. He prepares himself in case he'll be attacked. But then Paulie comes out of the bushes, vines and such littering her body.

"Paulie?" Snarl said incredulously, confused as to why Paulie was covered in filth.

Paulie shot him a glare. "Don't ask and don't tell." She said before walking off into the undergrowth.

Snarl just stares at her until she was gone. He blinks and shrugs before going back to eating. He takes a bite of the sawfish and swallows it. But he noticed it was a little rubbery when he bit it. But he thought it was one of those sawfish that swam a lot. But as he ate, he noticed it got harder to move his mouth. Then, after he swallowed the head of his snack, his jaw was immovable.

He started to panic. Sure, again, he's a robot but that doesn't mean he can't worry about his jaw getting stick. After all, he won't enjoy himself and won't be able to talk. He began pulling his lower jaw in an attempt to open it. But it was failed as his claws slipped after a few seconds of pulling. Feverishly, he looked around and saw a thin slab of jagged stone and rushed towards it.

He managed to pick it up and then put it in between his jaws. He started to pull the slab, trying to pry his jaws open with it. He heard his hinges cringe in defiance as they moved. He groaned as the pressure on his hands started to mount, his pain processor beginning to send signals (despite the fact his processor, and Transformers' processors in general have a higher tolerance than this) to his brain circuitry. And then, the slab broke in two from the extreme force placed on it.

He watched the half that was in his mouth (somehow) somersault in disappointment before it landed a few feet away while he clutched the other half. Snarl dropped the broken rock-pry bar and his voice chip created a sighed.

_Of course a slab of rock can't open your mouth when you can't even open it yourself._ His reason scolded. He then paced around, trying to think of a way to open his mouth. He could ask Paulie to try and pull it (with the aid from some top-class rope Rocky stole from Cons some time ago) open, but since she was messy at the moment, he thought she wouldn't be in the mood. Slug is a good thought, but he was currently doing his turn for scout duty. And Rocky was too small to be able to pull his jaw open with strength.

He gave a grumble, his anger getting higher. He let off a muffled grunt and succeeded to punch a rock. But that rock was supporting the ground he was on and thus, made him fall into the river. Thankfully, he didn't land on his back where his sail is. He managed sat up and then shook himself of the liquid.

_I'm in a bad mood and then I fall in the river. What a great day. _Snarl thought sarcastically, flicking his hand to rid the water. But he furrowed his face upon noticing something in the water. Something cream colored. He stared at it and from its color—and its smell—he figured out what it was when he looked up upon hearing a mighty laugh echoed from the other side of the river.

There he saw the owner of the laugh, Grimlock.

At the revelation, he steamed up, literally and figuratively. He now knew what was rusting his jaw gears, it was rust-a-glue, a special paste that makes joints of any machine unable to move—unless washed, and now, he was rushing towards the hysterical Grimlock—who looked like his sides would burst—with steam actually coming out of his nose. Grimlock continued to laugh; completely unaware that Snarl was closing in on him…

* * *

"Ugh…How am going to fly with this on me?" Paulie complained as she tried to remove another vine entangled in her wing.

Now, Paulie wasn't a fashion diva. Oh no, not even close. But she was an avid flyer and loves to fly around, thus the reason why she's complaining her wings are messed up. Because when her wings are messed up, she can't fly, and when she can't fly, she can't do what she loves most, and it makes feel her defenseless also.

She pulled another vine from her wing, this time it was lodged in between her elbow joint. How she got all those vines on her, you ask? Well, after a few minutes napping, she was jarred awake upon hearing a loud roar, making the primitive part of her brain module panic, which made her fly in a frenzy and cause her to crash into a tree, and that's pretty much it.

It took her a while, but she finally got rid of all the things that were littering her wings, but by this time, a huge crash resounded through Azral and then Rocky passed her with a worried expression. "Rocky! Where're you going?" Paulie shouted at him.

He merely shouted back faintly, "They're havin' a fight! And it's a big one!"

At first, Paulie was confused to that, until she heard a very familiar roar shook the air. _Uh oh… _She immediately took off and flew in the direction Rocky went. The trip was very quick and soon she saw two super-predators fighting to—at least she hoped it wasn't—to the death. She landed beside Rocky, who was maybe forty to sixty-five feet away from the giants fighting.

She saw Snarl biting onto Grimlock's tail making Grimlock scream before retaliating by fire breathing on Snarl, which made Snarl scream and let go of Grimlock's tail. Snarl then whipped Grimlock's face again with his tail, making the rex stagger back in wooziness. Grimlock then roared before tackling Snarl on the side, making the Spinosaur crash into a tree and groan.

"Guys! Cut it out!" She shouted as she flew in a gap between the raging croco-saur and the ravaged tyrant, making them stop in their tracks.

But that didn't stop them for long and they quickly tried to bypass Paulie, which made her move awkwardly to prevent them fighting.

"Guys! Fighting isn't the solution to solving all problems! And that means this one!" Paulie said, trying to reason with them.

"He trick me but me didn't fall on purpose on him!" Grimlock exclaimed slowly, a fluent sentence a difficulty for his voice chip.

"Hah! Like I'd believe that after you prank me!" Snarl retorted, strangely sounding British for that moment, and then the three were having a vocal fight while Rocky had a torn expression.

_Oh boy, I didn't mean for any of this! I gotta stop it before it gets worse!_ Rocky mentally screamed. But he wasn't too sure on how to stop them without getting himself hurt, but then he shook his head and put a determined face. _Who cares if I get hurt! I caused this, and I'm gonna stop this._ He then charged his voice chip before shouting, "Stop you two! I was the one who did it!"

The three—Grimlock, Paulie and Snarl—then turn to Rocky with looks of confusion, shock and curiosity. All of them then uttered "What?" for no particular reason. Rocky then took the Transformers equivalent of taking a deep breath before speaking.

"Grimlock falling on Snarl, I was the cause." He said plainly. After some time, Snarl and Grimlock's faces turned to those of anger.

"Why you little…" Snarl began to say but trailed off—most likely because he couldn't think of anything insulting to say—as he and Grimlock inched closer to him, making Rocky cower a bit.

"Uh, guys? I uh…didn't mean for this to happen you know uh… Really…" Rocky stammered as he backed away from the two.

"You big trouble!" Grimlock declared before he and Snarl, lunge at him.

Paulie is knocked out of her stupor and quickly rushed passed the large carnivores and landed in front of Rocky. "Woah guys, as much as I hate Rocky for tricking you, you can't attack him! He said so himself, he didn't mean for this to happen." Paulie said spreading her wings wide.

"Yeah!"

"Get out of the way Paulie, I'm gonna smash this little trouble maker and then put him back together, and then SMASH HIM AGAIN!" Snarl then tried to bypass her but Paulie blocked him.

"Hey hey hey! I said I was sorry!" Rocky stated, trying to hide behind Paulie better.

"Me crush you!" Grimlock shouted, doing the same thing Snarl did and mostly failed.

And now, the four kept shouting their parts, retorts and so on, their words blending into one incomprehensible jargon.

"Stop it, stop it, stop it!" Paulie shouted and stopping her movement.

"Why we stop?" Grimlock questioned loudly.

"Shh. Listen…" Rocky hushed and intently listened.

Everyone grew quiet and increased their hearing components. After some time, everyone heard what only Paulie heard at first: muffled laughter. Everyone looked at each other before going to wherever the sound is coming from as quietly as possible. Slowly they neared a set of bushes and all of them popped their heads through them, quietly, and they all gasped at seeing a steely triceratops laughing his head off.

"Why Slug laughing?" Grimlock whispered but nobody answered his question as Slug had the decency to.

"Oh Cybertron, that was a good one. Thank goodness I asked Ratchet on how to change brain circuits. Oh, I can't stop myself!" Slug said to himself before bursting into laughter and everyone gasped when he said that.

Everyone got it now, Slug set them all up. He tweaked with Rocky's mind making him wanting to prank Snarl and Grimlock, that then extends to Rocky helping the two to prank each other to fight each other and Paulie got mixed up in the frying pan. The group withdrew their heads and looked to each other.

"That rotten ceratops! How dare he does that to us!" Paulie whispered with anger.

"Certainly. How dare he!" Snarl agreed quietly.

"Yeah, me want to smash him!" Grimlock stated, trying to be quiet as well.

"Hey wait guys, I have a better idea…"

* * *

Slug gave out a yawn as he stretched. After laughing so hard yesterday, he quickly fell asleep with a smile on his face. Slug the triceratops then shook himself awake like when a dog shakes off the water off its body. He began to open his eyes but then squinted in confusion. All he saw was an expanse of sky blue and white puffy stuff. He remembered he was in his habitat when he slept, not the sky—he froze in realization. He looked below and saw that he was indeed as high as the clouds, on top of the tallest rock formation in Azral, and at the bottom, he saw various colored dots at the bottom and then he knew what happened.

He had been pranked by his friends.

"Guys! This isn't funny! Okay, I admit it, I did it! Now get me down from here!" Slug demanded, his legs trembling as he's not so comfortable with heights.

At the bottom, Paulie was cupping her ear and feigning that she can't hear him, which was partly true though. "What?! I can't hear you!" Paulie says teasingly and then giggles to her teammates, which laugh with her.

"This is NOT funny! Get me down from here!" Slug yelled.

"Oh sorry Slug! Paulie's a bit tired from fending us off! Maybe later when she has the energy!" Snarl replied.

"I said, GET ME DOWN FROM HERE!"

Everyone gave in to the giggles and laughs as Slug continued his complaints. Snarl turned to Grimlock and patted his shoulder. "Hey Grimlock?"

Grimlock stopped his laughing and turned to Snarl. "Yeah?"

"Sorry about what I did." Snarl said. "So, we're still buds, right?"

"No." Grimlock said plainly and made Snarl wallow, but then gave a smile. "Me kidding, yes we friends."

Snarl turned back with an amused grin. "Heh, nice one." He said before lightly punching Grimlock in the shoulder.

Paulie glanced at the two giants before looking up at Slug who was still ranting. "So what do you plan to do to make up?" Paulie asked Rocky.

Rocky looked at Paulie and then looked back at the cliff that Slug is on. "Well, for starters I'll ask Ratchet to fix my head and then…"

"Then what?"

"Then I think I'll do something nice for them." Rocky finished.

"Like what?" Paulie wondered.

"I'm not sure, as long as they find it nice." Rocky explained and Paulie nodded in understanding.

Everyone having done with their chats watched their little show of Slug trying to get down without dying with the sun rising into the sky.


End file.
